Two naked people dead after 4-story fall in downtown Columbia

[dystopia]

Two naked people dead after 4-story fall in downtown Columbia
http://www.thestate.com/136/story/97081.html

Two people died early this morning after they apparently fell off a four-story building across the street from Finlay Park, Columbia police say.

A taxi driver found a man and a woman in their early 20s - neither wearing any clothes - lying in the street in front of the building in the 900 block of Laurel Street, police spokeswoman, Sgt. Florence McCants said.

The victims were alive when rescue workers arrived at the scene, McCants said, and were taken to Palmetto Richland, where they were pronounced dead a short time later.

"It appears as if the two individuals were on the roof and could have accidentally fallen off the roof, onto the street," McCants said. There was no indication of foul play.

The two fell about 50 to 60 feet, McCants said.

Police found clothing for two people on the roof of the building at 900 Laurel Street, McCants said, and nothing else. She said police can only speculate at this point what they might have been doing on the roof.

Followup article:
Man, Woman Who Fell to Their Deaths Identified
http://www.wltx.com/sport.../story.aspx?storyid=50792

[Fuzzy]

Police found clothing for two people on the roof of the building at 900 Laurel Street, McCants said, and nothing else. She said police can only speculate at this point what they might have been doing on the roof.

[gleek]

I guess they wanted to be the first two members of the 50 foot club.

[twoiron]

I guess it would be almost as embarrasing as waking up after having a wet dream on a flight from Sydney to Los  Angeles...

[TFT]

At least they died doing what they loved.

[Salamander]

At least they died doing what they loved.

skyfalling?

[stegerman]

At least they died doing what they loved.

skyfalling?

Naked flying...only they weren't so good at the 'staying in the air' part.

[Uisce Beatha]

There is an art, it says, or rather, a knack to flying.

The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.

Pick a nice day, it suggests, and try it.

The first part is easy.

All it requires is simply the ability to throw yourself forward with all your weight, and willingness not to mind that it's going to hurt.

That is, it's going to hurt if you fail to miss the ground.

Most people fail to miss the ground, and if they are really trying properly, the likelihood is that they will fail to miss it fairly hard.

Clearly, it is this second part, the missing, which presents the difficulties.

One problem is that you have to miss the ground accidentally. It's no good deliberately intending to miss the ground because you won't. You have to have your attention suddenly distracted by something else when you're halfway there, so that you are no longer thinking about falling, or about the ground, or about how much it's going to hurt if you fail to miss it.

It is notoriously difficult to prise your attention away from these three things during the split second you have at your disposal. Hence most people's failure, and their eventual disillusionment with this exhilarating and spectacular sport.

If, however, you are lucky enough to have your attention momentarily distracted at the crucial moment by, say, a gorgeous pair of legs (tentacles, pseudopodia, according to phyllum and/or personal inclination) or a bomb going off in your vicinity, or by suddenly spotting an extremely rare species of beetle crawling along a nearby twig, then in your astonishment you will miss the ground completely and remain bobbing just a few inches above it in what might seem to be a slightly foolish manner.

This is a moment for superb and delicate concentration.

Bob and float, float and bob.

Ignore all considerations of your own weight and simply let yourself waft higher.

Do not listen to what anybody says to you at this point because they are unlikely to say anything helpful.

They are most likely to say something along the lines of, 'Good God, you can't possibly be flying!'

It is vitally important not to believe them or they will suddenly be right.

Waft higher and higher.

Try a few swoops, gentle ones at first, then drift above the treetops breathing regularly.

DO NOT WAVE AT ANYBODY.

When you have done this a few times you will find the moment of distraction rapidly becomes easier and easier to achieve.

You will then learn all sorts of things about how to control your flight, your speed, your manoeuvrability, and the trick usually lies in not thinking too hard about whatever you want to do, but just allowing it to happen as if it was going to anyway.

You will also learn about how to land properly, which is something you will almost certainly cock up, and cock up badly, on your first attempt.

There are private flying clubs you can join which help you achieve the all-important moment of distraction. They hire people with surprising bodies or opinions to leap out from behind bushes and exhibit and/or explain them at the critical moments. Few genuine hitch-hikers will be able to afford to join these clubs, but some may be able to get temporary employment at them.

[Aske]

"if at first you don't succeed, clearly parachuting is not for you"

[spacey]

There is an art, it says, or rather, a knack to flying.

The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss...

Karmalization. 

(Laura bought me a leather bound copy of the "trilogy" for my birthday last May. Along with Good Omens (read it, seriously), a mandatory annual read.)

[Eagleone]

"if at first you don't succeed, clearly parachuting is not for you"

Especially if you forget to have a chute in the first place.

[Uisce Beatha]

Good Omens (read it, seriously), a mandatory annual read.)

Amazon order placed on recommendation.   

[spacey]

Good Omens (read it, seriously), a mandatory annual read.)

Amazon order placed on recommendation.