[RANT] Ergonomics Suck

[campy]

Last month we had some consultants from Houston perform an ergonomics survey in our control room offices.  Today, the results of said survey were revealed when some movers invaded my office and removed my very spacious, and very comfortable desk and chair. 

In its place, I got a $5K stick of a desk with electric motors to raise the height and angle, and some torture device looking thing of a chair...This sucks.    My old desk had a ton of storage space, plenty of drawers and cabinents in which to store files, pens, pencils, rulers etc.  This *goshdarn* thing has *feces*.  All of my papers, files and supplies are sitting in two cardboard boxes, because get this, the these new desks do not come with any drawers or cabinents, nor are there any available for them...But I can raise it 6 *goshdarn* feet off of the ground, and I can tilt it to 45 degree angle.

I have never been so uncomfortable in all of my life.  This really sucks.  I am convinced this is a ploy from upper management to get my fat ass out of the office and into the field where I belong, but *fudge* me, they could have at least asked me nicely first before pulling this *feces* on me. 

[spacey]

Can I interest you in a nice warm glass of htfu?

[campy]

Can I interest you in a nice warm glass of htfu?

Leave me alone...Let me sit in my corner and pout peacefully.  I haven't the time, nor the patience for any shenanigans right now.

[twoiron]

Do these new fangled desks facilitate a "nooner" with your PA better than your old desk??

[stroh]

Can I interest you in a nice warm glass of htfu?

Leave me alone...Let me sit in my corner and pout peacefully.  I haven't the time, nor the patience for any shenanigans right now.

Times like this want to make a man chuck the corporate business world, strike out on his own, and reach for the American dream of having your own place like a nice pub.

bummer.

[campy]

Do these new fangled desks facilitate a "nooner" with your PA better than your old desk??

I suppose if one were blessed with such a situation, this new fangled desk would be much accommodating, and actually quite adventurous.  Now that you mention it, it does provide more room to rub one out so to speak, if I were so inclined.  

[Clive]

In its place, I got a $5K stick of a desk with electric motors to raise the height and angle, and some torture device looking thing of a chair...This sucks.    ...But I can raise it 6 *goshdarn* feet off of the ground, and I can tilt it to 45 degree angle.

Real men of genius

Today we salute you mister office masturbator guy.

Mister office masturbator guy

Here's to you oh maestro of the masturbatory arts.

You're not satisfied with simply yanking your own cord in private, you found a way to pull taffy for a living!

You're gonna go blind doin' that.

While others are content to separate business and pleasure, you feel the need to thrust yourself into your work.

Hey, I don't think this is White-Out ...

So here's to you ol' hard bargainer.  You bring new meaning to closing the deal.

And those are terms we can swallow.