[RANT] R U High?

So, we've had the worst snowstorm in 25 years, and after a 5:30 am reconnoiter I decide to let discretion be the better part of valor and take the bus to work.

This is not a big deal, I just have to leave 20 minutes earlier to get there 10 minutes later. I really SHOULD take the bus more, but it makes lunch a PIA. When gas was 5 dollars, I WAS taking the bus 3 times a week. I have to walk 2 blocks total at each end.

ANYWAY, I'm on the bus at 7:10 am (when I normally leave for work) and my phone rings. It's my Dad's phone#, so I instantly pick up:

'Hello'

'Hi Jim, it's (my Evil Stepmother) Darlene'

'Hi, what's going on?' (My father's had some health issues over the last few years, so I am on FULL alert)

'Well, we were wondering if you could do us a favor'

(By long established family custom, 'We' weren't wondering *feces*, because if 'We' were he'd have called me himself)

'What's up'

'Well, it's really snowy out and we can't get out of the driveway and I need a ride to work'

'Umm, I'm actually on the bus right now on my way to work. I left my truck at home'

'Oh, I thought you were off this week'.

'No, I'm working today and tomorrow'

'Doesn't your truck have 4 wheel drive?

(WTF this has to do with anything, I do not know)

'Well, yes, but the bus is a lot easier and safer when it's like this'

'Well, I don't have to be to work until 11, maybe you could come get me at lunch'

(Lunch is at 11:30. I get an hour. I would have to get on the bus, ride it for 30 minutes the wrong direction, get my truck, drive ANOTHER 30 minutes, pick her up, drive ANOTHER 15 minutes (still the wrong direction) and then drive 35 or 40 minutes back to work. All of this if it was sunny and 70* out. Today, with 8 to 10 inches of snow and ice on the side street and even the Interstates compact snow and ice, it could take hours)

'Ummm, I'd really like to help, but I don't think I could make that work. You live about 2 blocks from the park and ride, you could take the bus right from there, couldn't you? I think one of those buses runs right through Kent and on up the hill'.

'Oh, I don't want to do that, are you sure you can't come get us?'

FWIW, this is a PART TIME job at their church doing I don't even know what. (There's another issue here with my Dad, in that he goes with her and helps in the food bank and basically kills himself all day for free)The Pope isn't in town AFAIK, and while I know things are tight financially at Casa Dad, I don't think losing 4 hours at 10 bucks per is going to kill them.

'Umm, I really wish I could help'

'Well, if I got a ride TO work, could you come get me after?'

R U *goshdarn* HIGH!!!!??!!!!

LOL, SMITE!

Her cluelessness is pretty much a running family joke. Stories abound.

I'm at work one day last summer, and my dad calls me. They do estate sales to generate a little extra cash (she actually is a certified appraiser), and they had one going that weekend. So this is Wednesday. He's in Lake City (WAY north Seattle, I work in South King County) and needs me to help him move a refrigerator. No big deal. He's also buying dinner (turning into a better deal), and a ride home. To Federal Way, almost Pierce County. Call it 35 miles round trip, the first half of which is going to be in rush hour traffic.

My initial thought: No big deal, except: Why the *fudge* is my dad in Lake City with no car?

So I ask: Why the *fudge* are you in Lake City with no car?

He tells me Darlene dropped him off there and took off to Yakima with my oldest (adoptive/step) sister.

Umm, okay. It's not really a big deal, a little heads up WOULD have been nice, but all the stupid *feces* I put him through over the years, it's the least I can do.

OTOH, if the sale starts Friday, why the *fudge* is Darlene is Yakima with my sister, with their one car? And when is she coming back, because these things aren't a one man show by any means.

Well, she's supposed to come back Thursday night. Whatever.

So, my younger (adoptive/step sister) calls me an hour later. The REAL deal is that the older sister was supposed to drive to Yakima with my stepmother in the SISTERS car, but *bunghole* BIL #1 put the kibosh on that for reasons never fully explained, so they just left the old man in Lake City and took off. At the same time, BIL#1 is in Kirkland, 15 minutes away from the old man with 2 cars, on vacation. Sitting on his ASS, in other words.

So, Carmen calls BIL #1 and tells him to get his ass over there and help the grandfather of his children out, PRONTO, because he's the one who *fudge*ed the whole plan up in the first place.

And he did, too. Younger sister Carmen is a frigging TERROR when she is on the warpath, LOL...

Anywho, they're all nuts.