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Her Name Was Umlauta Strohson

 
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dystopia
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Her Name Was Umlauta Strohson
« on: May 16, 2010, 10:10:41 AM »




http://www.nevadaappeal.c...70&ParentProfile=1058
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A 41-year-old Gardnerville woman, intoxicated and topless, was hospitalized Monday after she reportedly stole a bottle of wine from a Gardnerville grocery store and nearly drove into a fast food restaurant in the midst of a raging snow squall.

According to witnesses, a woman identified as Brandi Smith, was driving erratically before pulling into the parking lot at Scolari's grocery store.

Smith, naked from the waist up, entered Scolari's and left without paying for a $20 bottle of wine. The store provided video footage of Smith.

One of the clerks said he confronted her about her lack of clothing and said, “She just walked right past me,” without acknowledging him and left the store.

She got into her car and drove toward Burger King. She stopped near the entrance to the drive-through with the right front tire over the curb and in the landscaping.
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MFAWG
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Re: Her Name Was Umlauta Strohson
« Reply #1 on: May 16, 2010, 10:16:36 AM »

I'll bet her husband told her she couldn't  have broadband...
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The things that will destroy America are prosperity at any price, peace at any price, safety first instead of duty first, the love of soft living and the get rich quick theory of life. -- Teddy Roosevelt
Aske
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Re: Her Name Was Umlauta Strohson
« Reply #2 on: May 16, 2010, 10:32:14 AM »

.144 and doing that crap?

she was either on real drugs, or off of rx drugs.
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Russia has invaded a sovereign neighboring state and threatens a democratic government elected by its people. Such an action is unacceptable in the 21st century.
--  Chimpy McFlightsuit, CEO of Bu$hco Industries of 'Merka
stroh
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Re: Her Name Was Umlauta Strohson
« Reply #3 on: May 16, 2010, 12:13:21 PM »

LMAO!
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dystopia
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Re: Her Name Was Umlauta Strohson
« Reply #4 on: May 17, 2010, 02:24:03 PM »

Men allegedly use case of beer as weapon in heist
http://news.yahoo.com/s/a...fe_st/us_odd_beer_assault
Quote
PUEBLO, Colo. – Bud Light may not be advertising these two as "Real Men of Genius." Two men are accused of using an 18-pack case of Bud Light as a weapon while stealing beer at a Loaf 'N Jug convenience store.

The men are accused of stealing three cases of Bud Light from the store early Saturday. According to police, one of the men used a case of the beer to hit a clerk during the theft. The clerk wasn't seriously hurt.

Police officers chased the suspects on foot. The affidavit said police found two cases of beer in a back yard, then went inside and found the men.
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stroh
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Re: Her Name Was Umlauta Strohson
« Reply #5 on: May 17, 2010, 08:53:20 PM »

Men allegedly use case of beer as weapon in heist
http://news.yahoo.com/s/a...fe_st/us_odd_beer_assault
Quote
PUEBLO, Colo. – Bud Light may not be advertising these two as "Real Men of Genius." Two men are accused of using an 18-pack case of Bud Light as a weapon while stealing beer at a Loaf 'N Jug convenience store.

The men are accused of stealing three cases of Bud Light from the store early Saturday. According to police, one of the men used a case of the beer to hit a clerk during the theft. The clerk wasn't seriously hurt.

Police officers chased the suspects on foot. The affidavit said police found two cases of beer in a back yard, then went inside and found the men.
...


LOL  At the same time assclowns like that give us Bud Light drinkers a bad name.

I had a first today.  I stopped off at a gas station (important) to pick up a six pack.   Couldn't open the cooler door.  It appears locked.  Upon further inspection I see a magnetic lock on the top of it.  I go up to the counter to inquire.  She says "I was waiting for you to yell and tell me to hit the button." 

What button?  Well I'm not entirely that dense so I see what's going on so I explain to her that I'm not from here and not only am I not used to yelling for the store clerk to "Open Cell Block 3" I'm still not used to being able to buy beer at an EXXon station.

LOL  Good times.  I love *goshdarn* Kalifornia.
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