GOLFHOS RYDER CUP, Round Two FINAL RESULTS

Round Two Matches:

BFBoy (11) v. Spaceage (13)
A surprisingly tight match, pitting BFBoy's legendary sandbagging against spacey's lack of golf skill and Mini-related lack of concentration.  BF jumped out early with a net eagle on #2, but some tired play mid-round squandered most of that gain.  Spaceage was a model of even scoring, avoiding both the low, rewarding numbers and the ugly high ones.
Spaceage +2, BFBoy +1.

Salamander (11) v. Fuzzy (4)
Sal comes out steady and stays that way, carding seven net pars and two net birdies (including both par-3s -- good ball-striking!).  Fuzzy is seeing his game come together.  His gross 79 included a front side with three bogeys and a birdie for 38.  A timely gross birdie was made on a stroke hole, nudging him through the tape first.
Fuzzy +7, Salamander +6.

Campy (8 ) v. Spanky (12)
Campy plays uneventful golf, carding only one big number and three net birdies.  Spanker Boy starts strong with net par, net birdie, then vomits a couple quads before parring the hardest hole on the nine (a sweet net-eagle dose of redemption), bogeying the second-hardest (net birdie) and making birdie on the next hole (net eagle) -- a run of +12 in three holes!  And that was the difference.
Spanky +7, Campy +1.

Uisce Beatha (9) v. Aske (5)
Whiskey played like crap, Aske played a course with a slope lower than I thought possible (96).  Uisce went around in lackluster fashion, but rallied with net eagle on the penultimate hole.  Playing aggressively, Aske made his errors on the stroke holes, except for a faltering natural double on his penultimate.  While that might sound dirty, the result is like one long make-out session with no release.
Halved, +1 to +1.

TFT (6) v. Clive (12)
Clive played surprisingly consistent golf, keeping his driver in the trunk while carding six net pars, two net birdies (on the two-stroke holes), and a net bogey (unseen OB swallowed tee shot by two strides).  Consistent golf isn't the name of the game in Stableford, though.  Proving why he's captain, TFT played a soft course and bolted out of the gate with par-birdie-par-par ... and that was before getting handicap strokes on the three of the first holes.  TFT generously downed some beer and the scoring rampage ended, but the damage had been done.
TFT +7, Clive +3.

Twoiron (3) v. JDerion (7)
JDerion had a hiccup early, putting himself in a hole.  The birdies didn't come easily, either, as he carded only two natural pars for the nine.  Twoiron proved that fatherhood agrees with him: overcoming bogeys on the opening two holes, he scored three straight birdie (one a net eagle) to put things out of reach.
Twoiron +9, JDerion 0.

Dunk (5) v. Teed (___)
Dunk played, and I can't really remember the details. so let's just assume it was LIGHTS OUT, baby!  Teed, sad to say, did not get out when he wanted.  He further confirms that his shoulder is out of commission, and therefore the match is forfeited.
Dunk, by forfeit.

1puttpar (10) v. MFAWG (8 )
MFAWG started the day with cantaloupe (man, that spelling looks wrong!), a sure way to go low.  And he did, bettering his course handicap by one with one natural and two net birdies and nothing worse than net bogey.  1puttpar was on fire, though, firing a natural six-over including three net birdies and finishing with a net eagle (gross birdie).  Scoring nine points in the first four holes always spells trouble for your opponent.
1puttpar +10, MFAWG +5.

Tdcoly (13) v. Golfer Ray (9)
Ted faltered when the bell rang, posting net double on the first; the score hit him hard, causing net bogeys on two of the next three to go negative-5 after only four holes.  Thereafter, he righted the ship and represented himself well.  Ray likewise net-doubled the first and net-bogeyed the second, rocketing to a negative-4 mark.  Our foreskinned man pressed on (or drank quickly) and saw his hole scores steadily drop.
Golfer Ray 0, tdcoly -4.

Wishi (Julie)(15) v. Stroh (9)
Julie and I differ on the math, so this one is subject to change without notice.  However, she played well and has a cute accent.  Hoping to throw her off her game, Stroh showed up in chaps and brandishing a microfiber cloth and a bottle of Pledge.  What he failed to bring was golf ability.  Luckily, he enjoys beating up on defenseless, well-endowed women.
Stroh, -2, Julie -5.


Round Two Score:
Team White Meat -- 4.5
Team Male Prepuce -- 5.5

Ryder Cup Score:
Team White Meat -- 12.5
Team Male Prepuce -- 7.5

Excellent question.  My master plan requires I play a certain nine.  Domination assured.

Thank you sir.

I gave a little extra time in view of the Memorial Day holiday.

I might maybe get out this weekend.  Possibly.  Or I may play hooky a half-day and try that Skybrook bitch again.

Clive, PM sent.

cool... I should find some time to get in several holes.... enough to get a win.....

what's the scoring format for this round again?

sure takin you awhile to finish  that 'gerkin'
 

Playing 18 tomorrow but it won't be a GHRC round.  Currently planning on turning in a nine hole round to be played Tuesday lunch time.

Roll the bones baby.  Let's see if I call it right.